


Blackout

by wallflowergardens



Category: Trailer Park Boys
Genre: Confusion, Drinking, Drunken Confessions, Friends to Lovers, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Out, Smoking, you know the usual
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-11 23:49:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15327105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wallflowergardens/pseuds/wallflowergardens
Summary: After a drunken night, Ricky and Julian share something that could change their relationship forever.





	Blackout

Ricky woke up and he didn’t know where he was. That wasn’t the weird part. Most of Ricky’s mornings begin with him not knowing where he is, the weird part was that on this particular morning, someone was laying in the bed next to him. He tried to sit up but fell back again and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He could feel a headache building up and with a loud groan he finally managed enough energy to sit up. He looked over who was next to him and his eyes widened in a shock of recognition. Julian layed there on the side opposite to Ricky, asleep and shirtless. He looked down at his own chest and realized he wasn’t wearing a shirt either.

“Oh fuck,” Ricky mumbled under his breath still in a confused haze as he rolled out of the bed. He landed on his knees and crawled across the room, to where his button up shirt and track pants had been thrown onto the floor. Pausing before pulling his last leg through his pants, he quickly grabbed a half empty bottle of beer from the night before and took a swig of it. He almost gagged but it wasn’t the worst thing he’d ever tasted, considering all the disgusting things he’s eaten and drank over the years. Besides, he needed the pick me up. He stuttered as he drank the rest of the beer and threw it to the side.

While attempting to put on his pants after struggling to button his shirt up the right way, he stumbled, failing to catch himself as he knocked into the dresser. Suddenly flustered by the realization that Julian may soon wake up and freak out, he stood completely still watching for any sign of movement. As Julian turned over Ricky’s heartbeat quickened, but he only made a small noise and continued to sleep. Ricky let out a breath of relief and made his way out of the room. As he left the bedroom, he realized that he had spent the night in Sarah’s trailer and all around him, were others from the park passed out on her living room floor. Sarah stood in the kitchen, awake and completely dressed for the day. When she saw that Ricky had finally woken up, she smiled and handed him a cup of coffee. Ricky and Sarah fought a lot but at the end of the day they grew up together and they’ve been friends since they were kids. They can always put their differences behind them to party.

“How was your night?” She asked. She had a knowing smile, and Ricky groaned again.

“I have no fuckin’ clue,” he said as he stole a piece of sausage straight from the pan. Sarah smacked his hand with the spatula she was holding. The sausage was still cold in the middle, not that it mattered to Ricky, he just wanted something in his stomach besides the obscene amount of alcohol he had consumed the night before, “what happened last night?”

“Well me and some of the girls from the park were having a few drinks, and then Cory and Trevor crashed, and then Bubbles stopped by, and you and Julian came looking for Bubbles, and before we knew it J-Roc brought his stereo and a ton more booze and it turned into a little party,” Sarah explained as she sat down at the table with her plate of breakfast.

She nodded towards the stove, signaling to Ricky that he could get a plate if he wanted. He grabbed some eggs and two more pieces of sausage and then sat down at the table with Sarah, “so, you and Julian?” Ricky looked up suddenly. Sarah slowly sipped her coffee without breaking eye contact with him. Her coffee cup was covering most of her face, so Ricky couldn’t read her expression (not that he does that very well anyway). Ricky barely remembered the night before, but did remember showing up at Sarah’s trailer looking for Bubbles. After that everything was hazzy and jumbled in his mind. They started drinking. J-Roc was rapping. Julian was laughing. Ricky was looking at him. Julian grabbed his arm. Julian whispered something in his ear. Julian was standing closer than he usually does. They drank more. Then blacked out.

“I don’t know what happened,” Ricky said. He reached into his pocket and grabbed a cigarette as Sarah refilled his coffee cup, “did me and Julian bang?” Sarah shrugged as she continued to pour, and was now refusing to look him in the eyes.

“I mean you and Julian have always been weirdly close, like he’s always taking care of you and stuff, I mean is it really that big of a surprise?” Ricky must have looked shocked because Sarah quickly reassured him, “look I don’t know what happened between you and Julian, I didn’t see what happened after you guys went into my room. Maybe you guys just talked?”

“Yeah, maybe,” Ricky said but each were very aware how unlikely that was. They both dropped the subject, and went back to eating their breakfast in silence. One by one, the people who were sprawled out in Sarah’s living room began to wake up and leave with a wave and a grunt. Cory and Trevor were still passed out on the couch until Ricky threw a shoe he found on the floor at Trevor. He thrashed awake with a loud shout, which also woke up Cory in the process.

“Cory, Trevor, wake up dickheads. I need your help with something,” Ricky said. He didn’t really have an idea of what he was going to make them do, but he needed a reason to leave the trailer before Julian woke up. He lead Cory and Trevor out of the trailer and brought them over to his car. He opened the trunk and started rummaging around looking for an idea for why he’d dragged them out here.

“Why did you wake us up, man?” Trevor asked. Cory yawned, and looked like he was going to fall back asleep right where he was standing.

“Because I need your help with something you idiots, is that so hard to understand? I thought you wanted to be friends but if you don’t that’s cool you can just fuck off and I can deal with this myself,” Ricky said as he held his hands up in defense. Cory and Trevor looked at each other.

“No man, we’ll help you out. What do you want?” Cory asked.

“Well start off by going and getting me a pack of smokes and some chicken chips from the store, and then I’ll give you your first assignment,” Ricky dismissed them. Cory and Trevor stood there with their hands up, waiting for a high five, but instead, only received a fuck off in return from Ricky. He looked around the park stopping as he noticed Bubbles hanging out by his shed, working on some shopping carts with the radio playing. Ricky could hear him singing along softly as he walked closer. Bubbles didn’t look hungover at all, even though he had attended Sarah’s impromptu party as well.

“What’s up, Bubbles?” Ricky asked when he was close enough to be heard.

“I’m just fixin up this old shopping cart,” Bubbles replied. Bubbles was always a calming presence for Ricky. He had always been there to help Ricky with his problems, but this may be the one Bubbles wouldn’t be able to help him out on. He wanted desperately to talk about what happened, but he wasn't even sure how to begin. He sat on Bubbles’ bed and pet one of his kitties as he watched his friend continue to work.

“How’s it going, boys?” Ricky froze when he heard Julian’s voice. Since he wasn’t awake when Ricky left, he wondered if Julian had remembered what happened last night. Julian looked the same as he always did, clearly unaffected by what happened the night before. He still wore his black shirt, black jeans, and held a rum and coke in his hand as he approached them.

“How drunk were you guys last night?” Bubbles asked. Ricky let out a nervous laugh.

“Oh man, we got fucked up,” he said, trying to play it cool. Julian looked over at Ricky as he took a sip of his drink.

“Yeah, I don't remember a thing,” Julian stated with shrug.

“Well, I left pretty early because I had to feed my kitties,” he said as he nodded towards the cat Ricky was petting, “but you boys were already hard on the liquor by the time I left.” He noticed Ricky and Julian were avoiding each others glances. Usually, when Ricky and Julian were mad at each other, everyone knew. They would scream, throw things, usually someone would pull out their handgun, but this time he could sense that something was different.

They avoided eye contact, and were seemingly refusing to speak, but not because they were mad. Bubbles decided that he was going to find out what was wrong between them, and solve this problem before it got out of hand. He attempted conversation, provoking them to say something, anything, but everything he brought up fell flat. Either Ricky and Julian didn't respond, or they refused to speak with one another on it, so the conversations quickly fizzled. Bubbles didn’t want to make this problem a big deal while they were still both in the room, and he knew from past experience that talking to them separately would be much more effective. Just as Bubbles was about to begin another awkward conversation, Cory and Trevor came running towards them.

“Hey dude, we got you your smokes and your chips,” Cory said as he handed Ricky the plastic bag.

“Wow, took you dummies long enough. I’ve been waiting forever, nice fucking job,” Ricky replied as he snatched the bag from Cory’s hand. Cory and Trevor looked down at their feet as if they had just been scolded by a parent.

“We’ll try harder next time Ricky we promise,” Trevor said.

“You better,” Ricky responded.

“Don’t be so hard on them Rick,” Julian said. Ricky and Bubbles both looked up suddenly at Julian, shocked because this was the first time all morning that he addressed Ricky directly. Ricky was going to say something back but gave up on whatever it was going to be and instead rolled his eyes and walked away, motioning towards Cory and Trevor to follow him. As soon as Ricky was out of earshot, Bubbles turned to confront Julian.

“What is going on between you two today?” He asked.

“Don’t worry about it,” Julian replied as he turned to walk away. Bubbles rolled his eyes and talked out loud to no one in particular.

“Oh yeah, don’t tell Bubbles what’s wrong even though he’s your best fucking friend,” he said as he returned to working on his cart.

***

_Julian watched Ricky take three shots of whisky in a row then cheer victoriously as he pumped his fist in the air. He smiled behind his rum and coke as he watched his best friend._

_“Maybe you should slow down a bit there, bud,” Julian said with a chuckle._

_“No man, we’re gettin fucked up tonight,” Ricky stated whipping his face of the alcohol that hadn’t reached his mouth. His face was red and he was smiling. He put his arm around Julian’s shoulders leading him over to the counter that the booze was kept on. Ricky attempted to make Julian a drink but he kept spilling the alcohol all over the counter so Julian had to take over. He had made his drink and was about to sip it when Ricky reached up and and tipped the glass forward, forcing Julian to drink the whole thing in one go._

  
_Julian immediately started coughing, and was about to yell at Ricky for what he_ _’d done, but when he saw the smile planted on Ricky’s face, he laughed and decided to just make another drink. As the night went on, they drank more and more, slowly growing closer and closer. Ricky’s lips touched Julian’s ear as he whispered something to him. He put his arm around Ricky’s waist as he whispered back, not wanting Ricky to pull away._

  
_Julian could tell he was getting drunk, but he was still coherent, or at least more coherent than Ricky. He at least remembered what had happened, but Ricky blacked out and seemingly forgot all of that night’s occurrences.. At around three in the morning, people began to calm down; Trevor was passed out on the couch and Cory was sitting next to him, mumbling to himself, J-Roc and half of the Roc-Pile were sitting on Sarah’s stairs outside, all talking over each other, and Ricky sat on the counter as Julian stood in front of him. Ricky was slurring his speech, trying to tell Julian something as Julian swayed where he was standing._

  
_“Listen man, listen,” Ricky reached forward, and grabbed both sides of Julian’s face so that they were looking each other right in the eyes, “you’re my best friend man. You’re my best friend, and I love you man, I love you and I apprecilate you so much.”_

  
_“Yeah, Rick, I love you too,” Julian said. He leaned forward so close that their noses were almost touching. Julian’s eyes darted down to Ricky’s lips, and he licked his own without even realizing._

  
_“No man, I really love you,” Ricky said. Julian shifted his eyes from Ricky’s lips to his eyes again, and noticed how sincere Ricky looked. Without really thinking about it, Julian leaned forward, pressing his lips against Ricky’s. It was clumsy and awkward at first, but after a second Ricky brought his hand up to Julian’s head and pulled him closer._   
_He twisted his fingers in Julian’s hair and Julian put both of his hands on Ricky’s hips. Everyone else in the trailer was either passed out or too drunk to notice what was happening in the kitchen. Ricky tried to pull Julian closer as their lips moved together._

  
_“Ow,” Ricky said and pulled away for a second._

  
_“What?” Julian asked, as he tried to even out his breath._

  
_“Your beard fuckin’ scratched me,” Ricky said as he began to laugh. Julian looked at him in shock for a second and then started laughing as well._

  
_“Shut the fuck up,” Julian said with a smile, and went in for another kiss. Now they were both smiling too much to actually kiss, which made them dissolve into laughter. Julian rested his forehead on Ricky’s shoulder, laughing into the crook of his neck. Ricky wrapped his arms around Julian’s shoulders and held him close._

  
_“Do you want to go to Sarah’s room?” Ricky stage whispered into Julian’s hair._

  
_“Dude, Sarah will be pissed,” Julian said, but Ricky was already sliding off of the counter and pulling him by the arm into the bedroom._

  
_Once they were inside the bedroom, Julian sat down on Sarah’s bed. Ricky got closer, standing between his legs leaning his face towards Julian. They started kissing again and Julian moved his hands underneath Ricky’s oversized shirt so he was running his hands up and down Ricky’s ba-_

  
“What are you thinking about?” Sarah snapped Julian out of his daydream. She sat down next to him where he was sitting at a picnic table near the playground. She reached over for the rum and coke and took a sip.

  
“Nothin’,” Julian said. He was pretty sure Sarah knew what had happened considering the way she was looking at him right now. Julian wanted to talk about it but he didn't want to make things awkward between him and Sarah. Before he could dwell on the topic any longer, Sarah decided for him.

  
“You know Ricky will find out. Either he already knows and is pretending or he is going to remember. You can’t avoid this,” Sarah said.

  
“Yeah, I know, but it’s weird,” Julian said with a shrug.

  
“Well do you want to be with him?” Sarah asked. Julian thought for a long moment. It was something he never really considering happening. It was always a joke people around the park made that Ricky and Julian were in love with each other since they were so close. They’ve been inseparable since they were kids and they were always there for each other.

  
Right as Julian started to say something, they were interrupted by J-Roc and the Roc-Pile walking up.

  
“Yo, Jules, I need you and Ricky’s help with somethin’ on the DL you know what I’m sayin?” J-Roc said. That usually meant J-Roc wanted drugs of some kind which means Julian would have to go find Ricky.

  
“Why do you need my fucking help. Go find Ricky yourself,” Julian said with an eyeroll.

  
“Nah he only listens to you mahfk,” J-Roc said. He sat down on the table and put his feet up on the bench next to Sarah, “me and the Roc-Pile need to get high to get into our creative headspace, you know what I’m sayin’.”

  
“Come on, Julian. Help us out man,” T said. He was already smoking a joint even though they were asking for drugs and he had another one tucked behind his ear.

  
“Alright fine. Follow me,” Julian said. He said a quick goodbye to Sarah and led J-Roc and the others over to Ricky’s car where he was hanging out.

  
“Ricky, J-Roc needs hash,” Julian said. J-Roc and the Roc-Pile were standing a few feet away standing in a semi-huddle, pretending to talk.

  
“Why didn’t he come here and get it from me himself?” Ricky asked. He was rolling a joint in a frisbee so he didn’t have to look up at Julian.

  
“I don’t fuckin’ know man. He’s acting all weird and told me to come ask you,” Julian said. He had his other hand, the one not holding his drink, on his waist.

  
“J-Roc! Get over here dickheads,” Ricky called out to the Roc-Pile. They all flocked around the car.  
“Ricky, we need hash or shrooms or somethin’, you got anything, mahfk?” J-Roc asked. Ricky reached behind him and threw a small package at J-Roc.

  
“You owe me, man,” Ricky said. They said thanks and promised they would get him back. Once J-Roc was gone it was just Julian and Ricky again. Julian looked like he was about to say something, but he ended up walking away. Ricky huffed and rolled his eyes.

  
Ricky finished his joint, grabbed a beer from the backseat of his car, and decided to take a walk around the park. He walked past the playground with the broken swings and sat down on one of the park benches close by. When he took the last sip of the beer and threw it near the overflowing trash can and missed by a longshot.

  
“Hey, you better pick that up,” Randy yelled at Ricky from the other side of the road. He was doing his daily walks around the park that Lahey sent him out to do to make him feel more important than he actually was.

  
“Maybe if you emptied the fucking trash cans every once in a while that wouldn’t have happened now would it so maybe you should pick it up,” Ricky said. It was fun watching Randy get all worked up. He grabbed the joint he put behind his ear earlier and lit it up.

  
“I empty the trash cans every Wednesday. It’s not my fault they get filled up so friggin’ fast,” Randy said. Ricky shrugged. Randy ended up picking up the bottle himself and putting it on top of the pile of trash and started to walk away.

  
“Wait, Randy, come back here,” Ricky said. Randy looked hesitant but he went to stand in front of Ricky. Ricky offered Randy the joint. When they were kids they used to get drunk and high with Randy all the time, mostly because it was fun to mess with him when he was

  
“Is that laced with something,” Randy asked.

  
“No, fuckbrains. I’m smoking it and I’m fine and handy. Just take it,” Ricky said. He was looking down at his feet as Randy reached out to take it between his two fingers.

  
“What do you want?” Randy asked. He sat down next to Ricky on the park bench.

  
“You’re like dudes and stuff, right?” Ricky asked, still looking down at his feet.

  
“Well, yeah I guess,” Randy said. He took another long drag of the joint. He offered it back to Ricky but Ricky refused it. He realized he didn’t want to put his mouth back on it after Randy did, “I like both guys and girls but i depends on the person mostly,” Randy said. Ricky considered that. He obviously wasn’t gay since he’s had girlfriends in the past and he really liked banging them, but maybe he could like both guys and girls. Or maybe it’s just girls and Julian.

“Why do you want to know?” Randy asked, narrowing his eyes at Ricky. 

  
“That’s actually none of your business so if you could please fuck off,” Ricky said and Randy grumbled to himself as he walked away to pick up the rest of the trash.

  
Ricky decided to take a walk around the park to clear his mind a little bit. As it started to get dark he made his way back to his car and was surprised to find Julian sitting on the hood looking down at the drink in his hand.

“We should talk, man,” Julian said when Ricky approached the car. He grabbed the frisbee from the front seat of his car that had dope and rolling papers. He started rolling joints so that he wouldn’t have to look at Julian.

“About what?” Ricky asked, playing dumb.

  
“You know what, don't act stupid,” Julian said. Ricky shrugged and looked around. He put the joint in his mouth and lit it. Once he was done taking a drag, he held his breath and passed the joint to Julian.

  
Both of them dropped the subject and smoked in an awkward silence. The sun started to set and they watched the sky turn pink, blue, purple, and orange. There were so many questions Julian wanted to ask but he didn’t know how to. He wanted to know why Ricky kissed him? Why last night and not before? Maybe he just did it because he was drunk and he didn’t actually mean it. Ricky was known for getting fucked up and doing stupid shit he regretted in the morning.

  
“What do you actually remember?” Julian asked once they were both high enough to bring back the subject. Ricky let out a sigh and looked up like he was searching his brain for the answer.

  
“I don’t remember much. I woke up this morning and you were in bed with me so I know something obviously happened, but every time I try to think about it my head short circulates and I can’t remember, ” Ricky said. He was getting frustrated and he tossed the frisbee that was still in his lap aside.

  
“It’s alright, Rick. Don’t worry about it,” Julian said and patted Ricky on the back.

  
“No, I want to worry about this. Tell me what happened,” Ricky demanded.

  
“Really?” Julian asked and Ricky nodded. Julian took a long drink of his rum and coke and started to talk, “we were at Sarah’s looking for Bubbles. We ended up having a few drinks and you said you loved me and then I kissed you,” he said sheepishly.

  
“You kissed me?” Ricky asked as if he couldn’t believe that Julian was the one to make the first move.

  
“Well yeah, you kept gettin’ all close to me and sayin’ you love me and stuff and I was drunk and you were drunk so….” Julian trailed off and shrugged. Ricky didn’t say anything at first.

  
“Do you regret it?” Ricky asked. Julian was quiet again. Being with Ricky in this way had truthfully never crossed Julian’s mind, but now that it happened, it felt right. It was obvious that him and Ricky had a deep connection, everyone in the park could see it.

  
“No,” Julian said and met Ricky’s eyes for the first time the whole conversation. Ricky was sitting higher up on the car which gave him the illusion of being taller than Julian.

  
“Would you ever like, I don’t know, want to do it again sometime when we’re not so fucked up so I can actually fucking remember or something?” Ricky asked. Julian’s heart started to race. Without answering, he slid off the hood of the car and stepped between Ricky’s legs, the same position they were in the night before. Julian then forward and pressed his lips against Ricky’s.

  
It was weird for a second but then Ricky relaxed into the kiss and put one of his hands on the back of Julian’s neck, twisting his fingers in the longer hair. Julian set his drink down on the hood of the car so he could wrap both of his arms around Rick.

  
Once they broke apart from the kiss, Ricky ran his fingers through Julian’s hair once more.

  
“Wanna hang out in my trailer. Get stoned and mess around or something?” Julian asked. He had just realized they were still outside on Ricky’s car where anyone could see them.

  
“Yeah, I just scored some moroccan blonde hash so I’ll get everything sorted and meet you there,” Ricky said. Julian looked at him for a second, gave him one more quick kiss, then turned to walk towards his trailer.

  
“See you in five minutes,” Julian said. He looked down as he was walking away and smiled as he ran his fingers through his hair where Ricky had just tangled his fingers in.

  
Ricky hopped off the hood of his car reached for the hash he had in the front seat. He Sat down for a minute and smiled as he watched Julian walk towards his trailer which was down the road. He snapped himself out of his daze when he heard someone saying his name.

  
“Did I actually just see what I think I saw?” Sarah asked standing in front of Ricky’s car.

  
“I mean that depends what you think you saw I guess,” Ricky said with a shrug.

  
“So are you and Julian totally banging now?” She asked and then took a drag of her cigarette.

  
“It’s not gentlemanly to tell,” Ricky said. He put the hash in the pocket on his button up shirt and left Sarah with a pat on her shoulder. As he walked to Julian’s he hoped what happened wouldn’t affect his friendship with Julian and then he realized how stupid his brain was being. They have been through so much together and it only made them closer.

  
He walked up the steps of Julian’s trailer. He considered knocking but when has he ever knocked to get into Julian’s trailer. He didn’t want anything to change between them so he barged in the trailer like he usually does. Julian was sitting on his couch flipping through channels on TV not even startled by Ricky barging in. He patted the seat next to him on the couch so Ricky went to sit next to Julian and put his feet up on the coffee table. Ricky waited for Julian to make a move but Julian kept nervously sipping his drink and looking intently at the television. It was obvious Julian didn’t want to push it but Ricky was getting impatient.

  
“Oh for fucks sakes, Julian,” Ricky huffed and moved to kiss his friend.

 

The next morning, Ricky woke up with a yawn. He was trapped under Julian’s covers but Julian wasn’t in bed with him. As he woke up a little more, he heard noises from the kitchen so he assumed Julian was making breakfast. He didn't bother putting a shirt on as he made his way to the kitchen.

  
“Bubbles I don’t have time for this right now,” Julian said. There was bacon sizzling on the stove and bread in the toaster. Julian was trying to get Bubbles out of the door of his trailer.

  
“Come on Julian. I just need your help with this one thing…” he trailed off when he noticed Ricky standing in the doorway of the kitchen shirtless.

  
“What happened here boys?” Bubbles asked making Julian turn red and Ricky rub the back of his head.  
“Uh...nothing?” Ricky said but his eyes flickered to the hickey on Julian’s neck at the same time Bubbles noticed it. His eyes widened in disbelief and then he broke out into a smile.

  
“Oh man,” he started but Julian started to physically push him out of the doorway.

  
“Alright, bye Bubs,” Julian said.

  
“So this is why you guys were acting so weird yesterday,” Bubbles said pointing at Ricky. He was still smiling and Ricky was trying to hide a smile of his own.

  
“I don’t want to hear it right now Bubbles,” Julian said. He managed to push Bubbles out of the door and close it. Then Bubbles appeared in the open window.

  
“Once you get done bangin’ I need your help at my shed,” Bubbles said. He still had a smirk on his face that made Ricky want to laugh.

  
“Yeah whatever Bubs,” Julian said and closed the blinds so Bubbles couldn’t see into the trailer anymore. They could hear him laughing and making jokes to himself as he walked away which made Julian and Ricky break out into laughter.

  
“Can I have some of that bacon?” Ricky asked already reaching a fork into the pan. Julian offered him a plate but Ricky refused. Julian leaned back against the counter and watched his friend eat the bacon with a smile on his face.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for some reason and here it is. I've been on a Trailer Park Boys kick lately and I'm really feeling it. I kind of edited this but not super well so if there are mistakes I'm sorry. Also I know the title is stupid and doesn't make sense but whatever. I wanted to post this because I haven't posted anything in a long time and I'm actually kind of proud of this (which doesn't happen a lot). So I hope you enjoyed and if you wanna leave a kudos and a comment that would be super awesome. Thanks for reading and if you wanna follow me or something my URL on Tumblr is blackleatherduster so yeah. Thanks!


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